La canzone più lunga di sempre con testo e video

La canzone più lunga di sempre con testo e videoEcco una bella curiosità, certificata nel 1997 nei Guinness dei primati.

Si intitola The Devil Glitch, ed non sarebbe nemmeno male se quel pazzo di Chris Butler non l’avesse così allungata da farci… un intero album, pubblicato nel 1996 di ben 69 minuti che si chiama proprio come questa incredibile super-canzone.

Di seguito la versione più corta (di 5 minuti) con (parte) del testo:

Testo The Devil Glitch:

Sometimes you can fix something by just being a prick

Winning by intimidation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just lifting your skirt

It’s the ultimate distraction

 

I poke button

I want action

Let’s hear some gears and see some smoke

No dilly-dally

Move your heiny

This is the age of “go for broke”

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just kissing some ass

If you don’t mind humiliation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just smoking a pipe

Academic contemplation

 

So pathetic

No mechanic

No steady eye, no magic touch

No screwdriver

Ball-peen hammer

And Mr. Fix-it’s gone to lunch

 

Not personal?

Yeah it’s personal

What did I ever do to you?

No crap from

Contraptions

Just do what I tell you to do
Sometimes you can fix something by just blaming your mom

Everybody loves a victim

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just cracking a joke

Humor is greasy lubrication

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just cooking the books

Wealth is all about perception

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just smoking a joint

Stoner free association

 

Broke down, lifeless

Junkyard worthless

No tweezer Jesus in the house

So desperate

So dependent

Pay any price to dope it out

 

I want genius

I wanna suss

The perfect kluge, the devil glitch

Oh, hosanna

Socket messiah

The only Jesus worth a shit

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just building a ramp

If you have that inclination
Sometimes you can fix something by just sitting around

Solutions come from relaxation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just blowing it up

The world reacts to provocation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just takin’ it slow

Our culture loves procrastination

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just hurrying up

We worship instant solutions

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just looking away

Zen buddhist inattention

 

Sometimes you can fix something with just a mistake

Don’t get too hung-up on perfection

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just doing it right

Craftsmanship demands precision

 

Sometimes you can fix something with total control

Aim plan for global domination

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just playing along

Give ‘em enough rope to hang ‘em

 

Sometimes you can fix something by working like hell

That will not hurt your reputation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by not working too hard

Burn-out is a real problem

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just having faith

Sometimes miracles can happen

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just saying a prayer

Wait for divine intervention
Sometimes you can fix something by just trusting your luck

Roll them bones and see what happens

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just being a cheat

Mastermind the final outcome

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just being tough

You gotta learn to take rejection

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just being scared

Heros never seem to live long

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a class

Learn new techniques, new information

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just building a wall

There’s such a thing as too much freedom

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just tightening your belt

Learn to live within restrictions

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just busting loose

Don’t let ‘em squish your self-expression

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just shutting up

Let someone smarter do the talking

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just coming in last

But wait till next season

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just holding out

Wear away the opposition
Sometimes you can fix something by just being a fool

Innocence trumps sophistication

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just knowing the law

When they try and pull a fast one

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just screening your calls

They’re always trying to sell you something

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just washing your hands

Eliminate contamination

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just wearing a mask

Sometimes it’s best to keep ‘em guessing

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just going to hell

Pave it with the best intentions

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just telling all

Exorcize your deepest demons

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just saying no

Take an intractable position

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just saying yes

If they can meet all your conditions

 

Sometimes you can fix something with just the right spin

Make ‘em question what they’re seeing

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just changing your mind

There’s nothing wrong with indecision

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just building a fort

Hunker down for the duration
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing sides

If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just getting laid

Orgasm releases tension

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just jacking off

You can’t get AIDS from masturbation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just getting drunk

A cure for mental constipation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just having one drink

Everything in moderation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just taking the heat

Or get out of the kitchen

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just passing the buck

Blame it on another person

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just turning around

Try a mid-course correction

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just trying to cope

With patience, tact and stoicism

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just starting to cry

People can’t take raw emotions

 

Sometimes you can fix something by running from your past

Join the French Foreign Legion

 Sometimes you can fix something by just turning a knob

Volume is a weapon

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just toning it down

Too much too fast might overwhelm ‘em

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just giving a gift

Mollify the opposition

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just taking it back

You don’t wanna spoil them

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just playing dumb

Try to get off with a warning

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just being sharp

Stall with a brilliant explanation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just going to church, come on

Maybe God will pay attention

 

Sometimes you can fix something by not going to church, come on

I’ve met too many evil Christians

 

Sometimes you can fix something by being against, against the establishment of the church

Antidisestablishmentarianism

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just suing the son of a bitch

Tie him up in litigation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just going home

Maybe the answer’s back in Cleveland

 

Sometimes you can fix something by hot-wiring the fuse

Though you may risk electrocution

 Sometimes you can fix something with just a better glue

High coefficient of adhesion

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just paying ‘em off

Then get on with what you’re doing

 

Sometimes you can fix something by not being home

Avoid unwanted solicitations

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just having the stones

If you can’t get no satisfaction

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just listening to The Who

Sing “my-my-my gen-gen-generation”

 

Sometimes you can’t fix something by just playing pinball

Though Tommy’s such a stupid album

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just speaking your mind

That right is in the constitution

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just biting your tongue

They say silence is golden

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just writing a book

Go on talk shows ‘round the nation

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just reading a book

Turn off that goddamn television

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just having a snack

Hunger wrecks your concentration
Sometimes you can fix something by just wondering why

Ain’t no harm in asking

 

Sometimes you can fix something by not wondering why

‘Cause sometimes answers are a prison

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just buying the beer

Get to know your new companions

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just taking a trip

The greatest place on Earth is Iceland

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just spinning your wheels

Sometimes the thing to do is nothing

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just spinning your wheels

Heat ‘em up for better traction

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just oiling your wheels

A little grease reduces friction

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just trusting yourself

Listen to your intuition

 

Sometimes you can fix something with just a tin can

A West Virginia exhaust system

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just pulling that switch

Justice is served by execution

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just drawing the line

There is a limit to your patience

 

Sometimes you can fix something with just the right phrase

Come up with a catchy slogan
Sometimes you can fix something by just changing one word

That’s how a thought becomes a poem

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just buying some time

Let things settle down some

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just being crude

Dirty jokes help male bonding

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just pulling some strings

Set things into motion

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just having the clout

The juice to get the job done

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just pulling rank

Declare an end to the discussion

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just giving ‘em lip

There’s power in sarcasm

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just showing respect

If they deserve it, give ‘em some

 

Sometimes you can fix something by just flipping ‘em the bird

Though that invites retaliation

 

Sometimes you can fix something with just a little paint

Cover up those imperfections

 

Sometimes you can fix something by throwing the baby out with the bathwater

A cliché’s okay if it’s a good one

La canzone più lunga di sempre con testo e videoultima modifica: 2013-01-05T14:18:35+00:00da blogmaster70
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